FR USA Exclusive: McCains unhealthy and tasteless/OBAMA under fire from PALIN and animal rights groups

According to a report published by the Washington-based think tank Fries-R-Us Associates (FR USA), McCains oven chips are unhealthy and lack taste.

Meanwhile, the Washington offices of the Organisation for the Betterment of Alpha Male Aardvarks (OBAMA), a benevolent group which campaigns on behalf of patriarchal South African bush-dwelling anteaters was picketed by a number of protest groups led by the insects’ rights coalition Progressive Ants’ League against Injustice and Negativity (PALIN). 

A spokeswoman for PALIN said “we will continue to barrack OBAMA until we get an apology for the pillaging of anthills in the bush”.  The group alleged that the wholesale consumption of ants by members of OBAMA was particularly accute in an expansive area of grassland in the west of South Africa, in a region known as the Great Western or GW Bush for short.

The ants then marched on to join their fellow insect campaigners for refreshments at the Bee Den.  PALIN’s actions were condemned by a rival anteaters’ group, a creative workshop known as the Dreaming Armadillos.