Will the Real Kate Bush please stand up?


I’ve referred to the early 1980s BBC comedy sketch show Not the 9 o’clock News on this site before (cf “Nice Video Shame About the Song” and the Two Ninnies “We like birds” song).    Here’s another sketch of note.  Pamela Stephenson, now trading as the psychologist Dr Pamela “married to a rather well known hirsute Scottish comedian, who this blogger has been known to do drunken impressions of at 60th birthday parties in Belgian restaurants” Stephenson does a passable parody of Kate Bush.

The sketch is a satire of the song Them Heavy People, (which is also linked here for comparative purposes), a cautionary tale warning people about the dangers of obesity.  Although Kate’s one of those people along with Enya and the French actress Irène Jacob of Three Colours Red and La Double Vie de Véronique fame that I won’t have a bad word about, it’s probably fair to say that some of her songs do slightly border on the pretentious or too- clever-by-half category with their pseudo-intellectual references to deep philosophical concepts and spirituality.  Who else could get away with a song containing references to whirling dervishes and lines like:

“They open doorways that I thought were shut for good.
They read me Gurdjieff and Jesu”

And no I didn’t know who Gurdjieff was either before I looked him up on Wikipedia.

Although she doesn’t succeed in looking like Kate, Pamela gets the voice uncannily accurate.  And I’m sure being a good sport and of fairly broad-minded principles Kate saw the funny side.  Hopefully so will you.


  1. The words to the song are absolute genius:

    “Went to my hairdresser to have a hair-do
    He asked if I knew A La Recherche De Temps Perdus
    That’s how I was introduced to Colette, Cocteau and Marcel Proust
    Now wholefood cookery is just a sideline

    (Shrill ‘La-La-la’ middle eight.)

    I went to Cairo and I read the Gnostic
    Apocryphon of John in the original Coptic
    Korsakoff’s psychosis theories
    And the Fibonacci series
    Studied acupuncture and the Bible – the Byabubble –
    Opened the windows in my mind”

    Beats that bunch of wankers who sing that fucking stupid song “are we human or are we dancer?”

  2. Thanks for finding this clip. Irritating how it comes and goes so frequently on YouTube.

    Brilliant all-around with the references to “Them Heavy People,” “Violin,” “Oh England, My Lionheart,” and “Babooshka.” Love the closing “charades”: “Daft!” “You are mad!”

    Thanks, again.

  3. Yes, it’s very cleverly done, Keith. “Not the 9 o’clock” had a panel of talented writers, some of whom went on to become well-known names. It was groundbreaking stuff which dictated the direction of satirical comedy for the next decade or so.

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